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Walking round in womens underwear
Walkin' Round in Womens' Underwear
Walkin' round in women's underwear
(to be sung to "Walkin' in a winter wonderland")
Lacy things - the wife is missin',
Didn't ask - her permission,
I'm wearin' her clothes ,
Her silk pantyhose,
Walkin' round in women's underwear.
In the store - there's a teddy,
Little straps - like spaghetti,
It holds me so tight,
Like handcuffs at night,
Walkin' round in women's underwear.
In the office there's a guy named Melvin,
He pretends that I am Murphy Brown.
He'll say, "Are you ready?" We'll say,"Whoa, Man!"
"Let's wait until our wives are out of town!"
Later on, if you wanna,
We can dress - like Madonna,
Put on some eyeshade,
And join the parade,
Walkin' round in women's underwear!
Lacy things ... Missin',
Didn't ask ... permission,
Wearin' her clothes,
Her silk pantyhose,
Walkin' round in women's underwear,
Walkin' round in women's underwear,
Walkin' round in women's underwear!
>From the album "I am Santa Claus"
by Bob Rivers and Twisted Radio
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The 12 days of christmas
The 12 Days of Christmas
December 14, 1995
Dearest John,
I went to the door today and the postman delivered a Partridge in a
Pear Tree. What a thoroughly delightful gift. I couldn't have been more
surprised.
With deepest love and affection,
Aberdeen
December 15, 1995
Dearest John,
Today the postman brought your very sweet gift. Just imagine, Two
Turtle Doves! I'm delighted at your very thoughtful gift. They are just
adorable. You big silly, what next?
All my love,
Aberdeen
December 16,1995
Dear John,
Oh! Aren't you the extravagant one! Now I really must protest. I
don't deserve such generosity--Three French Hens. They are just darling,
but I must insist, you've been too kind.
Love,
Aberdeen
December 17, 1995
Dear John,
Today the postman delivered Four Calling Birds. Now, really,
they're beautiful but don't you think enough is enough? You're being too
romantic.
Affectionately,
Aberdeen
December 18,1995
Dearest John,
What a surprise! Today the postman delivered Five Golden Rings; one
for every finger. You're just impossible, but I love it. Frankly, all
these birds squawking were beginning to get on my nerves.
All my love,
Aberdeen
December 19, 1995
Dear John,
When I opened the door there were actually Six Geese A-Laying on my
front steps. So you're back to the birds again, huh? Those geese are huge.
Where will I ever keep them? The neighbors are complaining, and I can't
sleep through the racket. Please Stop.
Cordially,
Aberdeen
December 20, 1995
John:
What's with you and those fucking birds? Seven Swans-A-Swimming.
What kind of goddamn joke is this? There's bird shit all over the house,
and they never stop with the racket. I can't sleep at night, and I'm a
nervous wreck. It's not funny , so stop with those fucking birds.
Sincerely,
Aberdeen
December 21, 1995
Okay Buster:
I think I prefer the birds. What the hell am I going to do with
Eight Maids-A-Milking? It's not enough with all those birds and
maids-a-milking, but they had to bring their goddamn cows. There's shit all
over the lawn, and I can't move in my own house. What are you doing to me?
Just lay off me, smart-ass!
Aberdeen
December 22, 1995
Hey Shithead:
What are you, some kind of sadist? Now there's Nine Pipers Playing.
And Christ, do they play! They've never stopped chasing those maids since
they got here yesterday morning. The cows are getting upset and they're
stepping all over those screeching birds. What am I going to do? The
neighbors have started a petition to evict me.
You'll get yours,
Aberdeen
December 23, 1995
You Rotten Prick:
Now there's Ten Ladies Dancing. I don't know why they call those
sluts ladies. They have been balling those pipers all night long. Now the
cows can't sleep and they've got diarrhea. My living room is a river of
shit. The commissioner of Buildings has subpoenaed me to give cause why the
building shouldn't be condemned. I'm going to sic the police on you.
One who means it,
Venomously,
Aberdeen
December 24, 1995
Listen Fuckhead:
What's with the Eleven Lords-A-Leaping on those maids and ladies?
Some of those broads will never walk again. Those pipers ran through the
maids and have been committing sodomy with the cows. All twenty-three birds
are dead. They've been trampled to death in the orgy. I hope you're
satisfied, you rotten, viscious swine.
You're sworn enemy,
Aberdeen
Law Offices
Badger, Bander, and Cajole
December 26, 1995
Dear Sir,
This is to acknowledge your latest gift of Twelve Fiddler's
Fiddling, which you have seen fit to inflict on our client, Miss Aberdeen
McHolstein. The destruction, of course, was total. All correspondence
should come to our attention. If you should attempt to reach Miss
McHolstein at the Happy Dale Sanitarium, the attendants have instructions to
shoot you on sight. With this letter, please find attached a warrant for
your arrest.
Cordially,
Badger, Bender, and Cajole
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